I pull out a world map and realize how blessed I am to have come so far…understanding that I have not even seen a quarter of God’s wonders.
I sit back and think of where I am today. My experiences these past few weeks…how much I’ve learned about people and myself!
How much work there is to be done in this world, but my obligation is to myself and my Creator. And in the process of fulfulling the ordained covenant, IA, I will be acting out my purpose(s) in life and serving mankind.
But, that’s all a bit conduluted right? unexpected even…you probably want details. I probably want to type them all out too right now. But how do I express the joy I feel now that I have accepted Al-Islam as my answer…
How do I express how alone I felt when my colleagues refrained from commenting or asking about my sudden style of dress?
How do I tell you how happy I was to share, when one finally did ask at the end of our week trip through Athens and Rome?
Italy? Amazing. Absolutely charming people. So helpful. And the men? Well, one of them called me Sade, so that was nice. Athens? Lovely place, falafel was dope.
How do I say over and over that I miss my family, and I miss my People, but that I cannot be there. Not now. Now when there is so much to see. Learn. Understand. and Share.
How do I understand why I feel as if I’ve aged 10 years in a matter of months, and that I am slowly but surely uninterested in the crazy pleasures of this world. And that, if it is to be so, I am looking forward to nothing more than settling down (metaphorically speaking of course) into a family and house of my own…where I can place all of this STUFF that I’ve acquired, and all the more things I shall obtain throughout my travels, where I can paint and create all the art that I want, where I can teach my sons and daughters and nieces and nephews sisters and brothers that they are so valuable. worthy, if they only knew…
if we only knew…
if you only knew…
And Mos Def continues to articulate the pains and joys of my experience…
“I look around and
Things are so weak.
People are so weak.”
I don’t have time to make other people feel comfortable. Especially when no one is going out of their way to make me feel too great, lol.
"[...]What each self earns is for itself alone. No burden bearer can bear another's burden..."[Quran 6:164]
And that’s the Word.
But, I’ll end on a more positive note…with another Mos Def quote, of course:
“They say the goodness in life belongs to those who believe. So, I believe. Yes!”
Peace ya'll, Amira